After defeating the Energy Bill Demon, Tunde believed he had finally earned peace.
But peace is a myth in the UK.
Because deep inside the aisles of every supermarket, behind the “Special Offer” signs and the “Clubcard Price” traps — lived a monstrous being:
The Supermarket Inflation Giant.
This giant controlled food prices, discount tricks, and the emotional stability of every immigrant trying to buy groceries.
And today… he wanted Tunde.
Chapter 1: The Plantain That Broke His Spirit
One Saturday morning, Tunde walked into Tesco with confidence.
He picked up a pack of plantain.
The price tag said:
“£3.50”
Tunde screamed so loudly that the bananas in aisle 3 filed a noise complaint.
He whispered, “Plantain? £3.50? Is it gold‑plated?”
The magical bus honked from outside.
“You have awakened… the Supermarket Inflation Giant.”
Tunde fainted.
Chapter 2: The Giant Appears
As Tunde reached for a bag of rice, the ground shook.
Shelves rattled. Cereal boxes fell. The self‑checkout machines started shouting “Unexpected item in the bagging area!”
Then a massive creature made of receipts, price tags, and expired coupons rose from the floor.
“I am the Supermarket Inflation Giant,” it roared. “Every time you blink, I increase the price of something.”
Tunde trembled.
“But why? What did we do?”
The giant shrugged.
“I’m bored.”
Chapter 3: The Egg Crisis
Tunde walked to the egg section.
A box of six eggs cost £2.40.
He shouted, “Are these eggs from chickens or from dragons?!”
The giant laughed.
“Soon, you will need a mortgage to buy bread.”
Tunde clutched his chest.
“This country is wicked.”
Chapter 4: The Pub Wizard’s Grocery Strategy
Tunde ran to The Drunken Unicorn.
“Sir Nigel, the Inflation Giant wants to finish me!”
The Pub Wizard nodded.
“He is the greediest creature in the kingdom. Even the HMRC Tax Troll fears him.”
Tunde trembled.
“What do I do?”
The wizard handed him three magical items:
The Aldi Amulet
The Lidl Shield
The Asda Price Wand
“Use these wisely,” the wizard said. “Or you will spend your entire salary on tomatoes.”
Chapter 5: The Battle of the Bargain Aisle
Tunde returned to Tesco.
The Inflation Giant towered over him.
“You dare challenge me?” it growled.
Tunde raised the Aldi Amulet.
Instantly, the price of rice dropped by 40%.
The giant shrieked.
“No! Not budget shopping!”
Tunde lifted the Lidl Shield.
The price of chicken wings fell.
The giant stumbled.
“Stop! Stop! You’re ruining my profits!”
Finally, Tunde waved the Asda Price Wand.
The price of plantain dropped to £1.99.
The giant exploded into a cloud of yellow “Reduced to Clear” stickers.
Tunde had won.
Chapter 6: The Affordable Shopping Trip
Tunde filled his basket with joy:
- Rice
- Chicken
- Plantain
- Indomie
- Malt
- And a discounted pack of chin chin
The magical bus honked proudly. The Pub Wizard toasted with discounted ale. Even the Energy Bill Demon clapped (before raising prices again).
Tunde became known as:
Tunde the Thrifty. Tunde the Budget Warrior. Tunde, Slayer of the Inflation Giant.
But the kingdom whispered of a new threat…
A creature more chaotic than inflation. More unpredictable than DVLA. More stressful than HMRC.
A creature known only as…
THE NHS APPOINTMENT SPIRIT.
To be continued.
