103 
Read his piece below…
“Have you been to Bourdillon? Or rather I
should ask when are you going to Bourdillon?
“What’s happening?”
“I hear people are paying solidarity visits
to the Tinubus to express their dismay over Senator Dino Melaye’s assault on
Senator Remi Tinubu, wife of the APC National Leader.”
“Assault?”
“That is precisely what it is. Assault. Sexual harassment. Abuse. Threat of
rape. Definite expression of intent to commit adultery and impregnate another
man’s wife.”
“I read that story. I still find it
difficult to believe that a distinguished Senator would descend to such
level. If that is the quality of
reasoning among Nigerian parliamentarians, then the country is in more serious
trouble than anyone could ever imagine.”
difficult to believe that a distinguished Senator would descend to such
level. If that is the quality of
reasoning among Nigerian parliamentarians, then the country is in more serious
trouble than anyone could ever imagine.”
“Dino Melaye has not denied the statements
he allegedly made. And the Tinubu camp is on an offensive against him. I read a
response saying if he carries out his threat, things will happen.”
he allegedly made. And the Tinubu camp is on an offensive against him. I read a
response saying if he carries out his threat, things will happen.”
“Things should not only happen, I think
every member of the National Assembly should undergo a psychiatrist test and a
drug test.”
every member of the National Assembly should undergo a psychiatrist test and a
drug test.”
“Ha. You can’t conscript the entire
National Assembly to undertake tests that are not required by law. And you
can’t jump from something one Senator did to cast innuendo on other lawmakers.”
National Assembly to undertake tests that are not required by law. And you
can’t jump from something one Senator did to cast innuendo on other lawmakers.”
“You call it innuendo? You try. From the look of things, male members of this
National Assembly are convinced that women are sex objects. Is this not the
same National Assembly where male chauvinists resisted a Gender Equality Bill?
Is it not in this same parliament that supposedly distinguished men stood up to
defend marriage to the girl-child? And now you have a Senator threatening to
beat up a female colleague, rape, impregnate her and that nothing will happen.”
National Assembly are convinced that women are sex objects. Is this not the
same National Assembly where male chauvinists resisted a Gender Equality Bill?
Is it not in this same parliament that supposedly distinguished men stood up to
defend marriage to the girl-child? And now you have a Senator threatening to
beat up a female colleague, rape, impregnate her and that nothing will happen.”
“The man practically admitted his love of
violence and lack of respect for a colleague. That is too much of an insult to
the Madam and her husband.”
violence and lack of respect for a colleague. That is too much of an insult to
the Madam and her husband.”
“I read on Sahara Reporters that he
eventually changed his mind, though”
eventually changed his mind, though”
“How?”
“Sahara Reporters says he later told Mrs
Tinubu, “F…. you.”
Tinubu, “F…. you.”
“F…. another man’s wife?”
“Yes. But he said worse. He reportedly said
he would not even demean himself by impregnating a Bonga fish, and that he
would prefer a robust woman like Senator Stella Oduah.”
he would not even demean himself by impregnating a Bonga fish, and that he
would prefer a robust woman like Senator Stella Oduah.”
“What? The scallywag wants to hold
so-so-so-me-thing!”
so-so-so-me-thing!”
“He has not denied saying so.”
“But are you sure there isn’t a Nollywood
wing in that Senate and some of the members are rehearsing a block-buster home
video?”
wing in that Senate and some of the members are rehearsing a block-buster home
video?”
“Which home video? The altercation took
place at a closed-door meeting of the Senate. Mrs Tinubu’s offence was that he
criticized Senator Melaye’s contribution to a discussion, and the fellow became
enraged. He had to be physically restrained from actually beating up the woman,
and proceeding there and then to rape and impregnate her with immediate effect”
place at a closed-door meeting of the Senate. Mrs Tinubu’s offence was that he
criticized Senator Melaye’s contribution to a discussion, and the fellow became
enraged. He had to be physically restrained from actually beating up the woman,
and proceeding there and then to rape and impregnate her with immediate effect”
“Chei. I wish I were in Asiwaju Tinubu’s
shoes…”
shoes…”
“What will you do? You will invite Melaye
to a physical combat? Have you seen the guy’s biceps and how heavily built he
is? This is not a matter you settle with muscles.”
to a physical combat? Have you seen the guy’s biceps and how heavily built he
is? This is not a matter you settle with muscles.”
“Meaning?”
“There are sub-texts. Dino is probably
fighting proxy war. His target may not be the woman but her husband. Besides,
the guy seems to have quite a reputation for beating up women. Ask his first
wife. Ask his second wife.”
fighting proxy war. His target may not be the woman but her husband. Besides,
the guy seems to have quite a reputation for beating up women. Ask his first
wife. Ask his second wife.”
“Mrs Tinubu should sue him”
“He will claim privilege. Every
communication on the floor of the Senate is privileged.”
communication on the floor of the Senate is privileged.”
“What privilege? That privilege should not
cover anyone threatening violence, rape, assault and adultery. What if he was
not restrained, he would have slapped Mrs. Tinubu or what? I also find the
silence of the Senate leadership in this matter terribly offensive. By now, Senator Melaye should be standing before
a Disciplinary Committee.”
cover anyone threatening violence, rape, assault and adultery. What if he was
not restrained, he would have slapped Mrs. Tinubu or what? I also find the
silence of the Senate leadership in this matter terribly offensive. By now, Senator Melaye should be standing before
a Disciplinary Committee.”
“But again, is this whole story possible?”
“What will the Tinubus gain from lying
against Melaye?”
against Melaye?”
“You know, for some reason, I sympathize with
that fellow, you know. What he has done, previously and right now, is very much
like riding the Tiger. “
that fellow, you know. What he has done, previously and right now, is very much
like riding the Tiger. “
“Certain kinds of persons should not be in
the National assembly to start with. Is it not from this same National Assembly
that the US Embassy named and shamed some lawmakers who went to the US on a
sponsored trip to solicit for sex, with one of them almost raping a hotel
attendant? This thing called democracy must be protected from women abusers,
rapists and adulterers.”
the National assembly to start with. Is it not from this same National Assembly
that the US Embassy named and shamed some lawmakers who went to the US on a
sponsored trip to solicit for sex, with one of them almost raping a hotel
attendant? This thing called democracy must be protected from women abusers,
rapists and adulterers.”
“If this was in the US or the UK, by now,
there will be protesters on the streets calling for Melaye’s head and seat. His constituents would have
initiated the process of his recall.”
there will be protesters on the streets calling for Melaye’s head and seat. His constituents would have
initiated the process of his recall.”
“Have you also not noticed that other
female members of the National assembly have not spoken up. They are
dangerously silent.”
female members of the National assembly have not spoken up. They are
dangerously silent.”
“That is stupid. Do they want to be beaten
up? Raped? And impregnated by violent colleagues? Are they happy that a male
colleague is threatening to rape and impregnate?”.
up? Raped? And impregnated by violent colleagues? Are they happy that a male
colleague is threatening to rape and impregnate?”.
“To call another man’s wife, Bonga fish.
And openly say you prefer that other female Senator as a sex object. That
Melaye needs help, I must say. Where is he from?”
And openly say you prefer that other female Senator as a sex object. That
Melaye needs help, I must say. Where is he from?”
“Right now, I wonder what Dino Melaye would
have called Theresa May, the new Prime Minister of Britain”
have called Theresa May, the new Prime Minister of Britain”
“Do not go there. He wouldn’t dare. The
kind of nonsense behaviour that is allowed in the name of lawmaking and
leadership in this country is impossible in civilized places. Can you ever
imagine any parliamentarian in the UK openly abusing a female colleague and
threatening to rape and impregnate her?”
kind of nonsense behaviour that is allowed in the name of lawmaking and
leadership in this country is impossible in civilized places. Can you ever
imagine any parliamentarian in the UK openly abusing a female colleague and
threatening to rape and impregnate her?”
“All these our leaders, they love titles
but not the responsibility that comes with high office. Just look at how the
British have managed a major transition in the life of their nation, it was all
done so decently.”
but not the responsibility that comes with high office. Just look at how the
British have managed a major transition in the life of their nation, it was all
done so decently.”
“Impressive. Classically British. The
country is more important than every one.”
country is more important than every one.”
“David Cameron leads the country out of the
European Union against his personal wish and to economic disaster. He takes
responsibility and he steps aside.”
European Union against his personal wish and to economic disaster. He takes
responsibility and he steps aside.”
“In Nigeria, he would have stayed on. After
all, there was no election. Nobody resigns here. Public office for the average
Nigerian is about stomach infrastructure.”
all, there was no election. Nobody resigns here. Public office for the average
Nigerian is about stomach infrastructure.”
“But
in the UK, it is about service. Did you read Cameron’s valedictory speech?
Solid. No malice. No regrets. The other
week, he was down with rotten eggs on his face, but two days ago, he left
office with his head held high. The British system works. When things go wrong,
there are ways of dealing with them.”
in the UK, it is about service. Did you read Cameron’s valedictory speech?
Solid. No malice. No regrets. The other
week, he was down with rotten eggs on his face, but two days ago, he left
office with his head held high. The British system works. When things go wrong,
there are ways of dealing with them.”
“We shouldn’t compare apples and oranges.
We can talk about lessons, but not to expect the same standards.”
We can talk about lessons, but not to expect the same standards.”
“Look at Theresa May, the new PM. The very
day she assumed office, she named her cabinet. She is prepared. She is ready. She
is competent. That is how to hit the ground running. Here, State Governors
spend a whole year struggling to appoint ordinary commissioners.”
day she assumed office, she named her cabinet. She is prepared. She is ready. She
is competent. That is how to hit the ground running. Here, State Governors
spend a whole year struggling to appoint ordinary commissioners.”
“State Governors? What of…?”
“Meshionu…
Alakoba somebody. It is not from my mouth that you will hear about
physical, social psychological and existential violence in high places. But
look again at what Theresa May has done. She has appointed into her cabinet, the
Brexiteers, the same people who wanted Britain out of the EU. She has put
together a cabinet that accommodates her rivals to show that she nurses no
malice against anyone. Can you imagine Boris Johnson becoming Foreign
Secretary?”
Alakoba somebody. It is not from my mouth that you will hear about
physical, social psychological and existential violence in high places. But
look again at what Theresa May has done. She has appointed into her cabinet, the
Brexiteers, the same people who wanted Britain out of the EU. She has put
together a cabinet that accommodates her rivals to show that she nurses no
malice against anyone. Can you imagine Boris Johnson becoming Foreign
Secretary?”
“I don’t support that.”
“Sorry, your opinion does not matter. Ko mata,
ko muyo.”
ko muyo.”
“Boris Johnson is an isolationist. And he doesn’t like Africans.”
“He loves Britain, his country. That is
what matters.”
what matters.”
“I wish the new Prime Minister well, then.
History made. She has Mrs Margaret Thatcher’s record to contend with.”
History made. She has Mrs Margaret Thatcher’s record to contend with.”
“No.
You miss the point. She will not be judged on the grounds of gender.”
You miss the point. She will not be judged on the grounds of gender.”
“Don’t fool yourself about that very point.
Even in the UK, gender is an issue. Nobody talked about Cameron’s shoes or navy
suits, for example. But since Theresa May arrived, there has been so much
obsession with her clothes and leopard print kitten heels.”
Even in the UK, gender is an issue. Nobody talked about Cameron’s shoes or navy
suits, for example. But since Theresa May arrived, there has been so much
obsession with her clothes and leopard print kitten heels.”
“But she is lucky she doesn’t have a Dino
Melaye around her.”
Melaye around her.”
“Impossible.”
“And nobody will ever threaten to beat her
up, rape her or impregnate her.”
up, rape her or impregnate her.”
“Why are you DinoMelaye-ing Theresa May?
Can you stop? This is precisely why a Boris Johnson thinks you people
should be kept out of Britain, so that in the long run you don’t pollute the
decent space the British created over the centuries.”
Can you stop? This is precisely why a Boris Johnson thinks you people
should be kept out of Britain, so that in the long run you don’t pollute the
decent space the British created over the centuries.”
“You know, to tell the truth, sometimes I
wonder how foreigners manage to relate with us. Can you imagine the President of
Nigeria going on a foreign trip, with a Senator who was once accused of rape,
or a Governor who was once a crook? The civilized oyinbo people will shake hands, shake their heads also, but
privately among themselves, they would wonder if it would not have been better
if they didn’t colonize Africa at all.”
wonder how foreigners manage to relate with us. Can you imagine the President of
Nigeria going on a foreign trip, with a Senator who was once accused of rape,
or a Governor who was once a crook? The civilized oyinbo people will shake hands, shake their heads also, but
privately among themselves, they would wonder if it would not have been better
if they didn’t colonize Africa at all.”
“And leave us in our natural, pre-colonial
states, eh?. I can’t laugh oh. May be if they didn’t, by now you will be a
dreadful dibia in a forest, with 100
wives.”
states, eh?. I can’t laugh oh. May be if they didn’t, by now you will be a
dreadful dibia in a forest, with 100
wives.”
“And Dino?”
“That one? He will be a deep forest hunter,
beating up people’s wives, raping and impregnating them and threatening that
nothing will happen to him.”
beating up people’s wives, raping and impregnating them and threatening that
nothing will happen to him.”
“Only in Nigeria.”
“ I guess there is a lot more that you can
talk about in that manner.”
talk about in that manner.”
“Like Abia”
“Really messy out there.”
“A court of law with competent jurisdiction
rules, INEC complies, but the politicians insist they have a different opinion,
and the entire system gets sucked into a crisis.”
rules, INEC complies, but the politicians insist they have a different opinion,
and the entire system gets sucked into a crisis.”
“Don’t go there. You get that kind of
situation when everything in a country is so uncertain.”
situation when everything in a country is so uncertain.”
“But if we lose the courts, what do we have
left?”
left?”
“We lost the courts already, even the
lawyers.”
lawyers.”
“In Abia or Abuja?”
“You answer the question yourself”.
“And the video that the US Mission was going
to show at the House of Representatives? Did that happen?
to show at the House of Representatives? Did that happen?
“Which video? It didn’t happen.”
“Never mind. The British have just given us
an answer. A country must work for its people. That is why Theresa May says her
mission is to make Britain work for every one.”
an answer. A country must work for its people. That is why Theresa May says her
mission is to make Britain work for every one.”
“Nigeria must also work for every one, not
a privileged few.”
a privileged few.”
“Yes. Yes. Yes. We should add that line to the
National Anthem.”
National Anthem.”
“Hmm. Seriously.”
